


No flaming sword needed (you make me hot already)

by LaurelQuill



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: BAMF Aziraphale (Good Omens), First Kiss, Fluff, Light Angst, Love Confessions, M/M, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Not Beta Read, Smitten Crowley (Good Omens)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-04
Updated: 2019-08-04
Packaged: 2020-07-30 19:10:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,810
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20102197
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LaurelQuill/pseuds/LaurelQuill
Summary: Based on a post I wrote on Tumblr at 2 am.Hastur goes to Crowley's flat and threatens to kill Crowley. Aziraphale snaps and shows he can be a soldier when needed.





	No flaming sword needed (you make me hot already)

**Author's Note:**

> Look it's 5 am and English it's not my first language, so feel free to tell me if there are any mistakes.

It shouldn't have been such a surprise, in hindsight.

Aziraphale was used to living in constant fear of being discovered, his mind always a cacophony of What if's and anxiety: '_What if I did the wrong thing? What if I get caught fraternizing with the enemy? What if the holy water hurts Crowley? What if Gabriel finds out what if that's not the Antichrist what if we go to war **whatifwhatifwhatif**_'. Of course, almost every single time it happened that old demon had soothed his nerves when his speculations spiraled out of control.  
So when he saw his panicked expression reflected in Crowley's wide eyes, he knew they were in serious trouble.

"You need to hide, angel. Quick!"

"I thought they were going to leave us alone! We don't have a plan, Crowley! You also need to hide"

"We're in my blessed flat! Why would I be the one hiding _in my own place_, Aziraphale? Besides, it's only Hastur, I've gotten rid of him twice already, third time's a charm or whatever. Now go!"

Aziraphale (albeit reluctantly) left the room but didn't go too far. Just in case. He didn't know if Hastur came alone or if there were others with him, and he wasn't about to let Crowley fight alone after all they had been through. They were on their own side now, and Aziraphale was nothing if not loyal.

He had also been just about to gather all his courage and confess his feelings to Crowley, so he was, understandably, a bit upset.

Finding a good spot just in the corner of Crowley's office, he stood as still as one of the plants and listened.

"Ok. It's ok. You got this. Come on!" murmuring, Crowley put on his sunglasses and opened the door, "Hastur! What do I owe the pleasure?"

"Shut up Crowley, I know what you did, you disgusting traitor" with a shove on the shoulder Hastur had made his way inside. Shit, he wasn't in the mood for this, it had only been four days since the whole trial incident, he thought they would have more time. "You'll have to be more specific, I've done a lot of things. " He hoped the smirk and the carefree facade were enough to throw him off.

They weren't.

"Quit playing games, Crowley. We both know you can't be redeemed, so you can't be immune to holy water either. You must've done something." Oh, so he hadn't actually discovered them, Crowley could work with that. He just had to throw him for a loop, scare him a bit more.  
"Oh but Hastur, are you sure? You saw it yourself: me bathing in that water, not a single burn, as solid as a corporeal form can be." Flippancy was the only thing separating Crowley from a complete disaster, and he was adamant in keeping it that way.

"Look at you, acting so cocky because you and that stupid, good for nothing angel delayed Armageddon a few years. Do you seriously think he likes you? You're a demon Crowley, and demons can't be trusted, let alone liked by anybody. "

The smirk on the demon's face slipped a little, almost turning into a scowl and betraying him. He had already come to terms with the fact that Aziraphale didn't care as deeply for him as he did, but he didn't need anyone saying out loud everything his thoughts already provided at night.

A few meters away, the face of a specific angel was getting redder by the second. Here he was, waiting to tell Crowley how much he meant to him, and that... bad demon over there telling Crowley just the contrary! Who did he think he was? Speaking nothing but fallacies, and in his name too! Oh, how he wanted to go out there and tell him a few things. But he couldn't, he had promised Crowley he would stay hidden, and he didn't want to stress the dear any more than he already was.  
But his patience was wearing thin, so that demon Hastur should be going away in the next two minutes or so help him he wouldn't hold back anymore.

Crowley wasn't far away from him, on that mentality. "Look, I like a good visit as much as the next guy. Except I don't. So if you don't have anything else to say-"  
"Oh but I do," Hastur smiled as if he had been expecting Crowley to say something like that. Crowley gulped. "I was wondering, since you like to bathe in holy water so much, you wouldn't mind giving me another demonstration to clear up my doubts."

"You didn't," Crowley said, eyebrows raised above his glasses.

"He didn't" Aziraphale silently echoed, horrified.

"I did." confirmed Hastur, carefully removing a familiar spray bottle from the pocket of his coat. "You know, I kept thinking about what you told me right after killing Ligur. This really is the most efficient in the market, I wonder if what it contained was real holy water or if it was a scam, just like in the trial. Let's find out, eh?"

Golden eyes watched in utter panic as Hastur pointed the bottle at him. "Where's your angel now, Crowley? Bet he won't even notice you're dead, he'll be a bit busy when Lord Beelzebub gives word Upstairs about your obvious mortality and they go after him. " Crowley could do nothing but hiss at the bastard, his mind coming up with possible plans of escape as fast as getting rid of every single one. He had no control over what was going to happen, and he hated it.

Hastur closed his hand around the trigger, and Crowley closed his eyes, praying to Someone that his angel would be able to escape in time.

He was expecting pain.

He felt nothing.

"What the- ah!" Hastur dropped the bottle on the ground, both demons looking down confused at the holy water boiling and melting the plastic completely.

"Did you do that!?" panic laced Hastur's question, but Crowley was too occupied trying to comprehend the current situation to take credit.

"I'm afraid that was me" a third voice intervened, too airy and cheerful to be a demon.

"But- when- what are you doing here!?" Hastur's voice was too shaky to be threatening. He hadn't expected the angel actually showing up.

Crowley still hadn't moved an inch.

"Turns out," Aziraphale pressed on. "I happen to like Crowley quite a lot. And let me tell you, I'm not particularly fond of giving away things I like." With each word, he took a step closer to where Hastur and Crowley were frozen in place. His words were casual, like he was saying he saw a nightingale fly by the other day, but the atmosphere in the room reeked of ozone and the smell of burnt plastic, and Crowley felt as if he was deep underwater, the pressure on his shoulders too great to be normal.

This was the pressure of angelic energy, and a quick glance at Hastur confirmed he sensed it too.

Aziraphale was too preoccupied trying to control himself to take notice of the exchange between the demons. That had been the last straw, he was pissed and tired of Heaven and Hell threatening them, threatening _Crowley_, and if that wretched demon wanted to kill his friend, he would have to get through him first.

Aziraphale smiled.

Somehow that smile made Crowley's insides tighten in fear and flutter with butterflies at the same time. He remembered his trial, well, Aziraphale's trial. He had stared at Grabriel's stupid face and seen the murderous smile directed at him, the restrained hate in it. That smile had been cruel.

The one that his angel was sporting was nothing short of terrifying.

Hastur was currently taking a step back each time Aziraphale took one towards him. "I'm not afraid of you, you disgusting angel," He spat. "if Crowley faked the holy water I'm sure you faked the hellfire too"

"Oh, pity. **You should be**" in the blink of an eye the angel had slammed Hastur against the nearest wall, creating a spider web of cracks on it with the force and leaving both demons reaching out for air (for two different reasons).

Aziraphale got closer until he could feel the fear radiating off of Hastur, "You may as well go back to where you came from, because if you want to do anything to him, you'll have to get through me first." he whispered loud enough for the three of them to hear in the silence of the room. "And I assure you, young boy" he continued, letting a bit of angelic energy out and creating a few more cracks on the wall, "that when I'm done with you, you'll wish you had Fallen again and died afterwards."

He let Hastur drop to the floor, and watched him vanish accompanied by a string of shrieks.

"Well," he clapped his hands, "I don't think he'll come around again, my dear. Everything should be sorted out now. Crowley?" He turned around and immediately went to Crowley's side. "Crowley, dear, are you ok? Did the water touch you?"

"Ah-" Crowley was, for lack of a better explanation, too aroused and stunned to fully comprehend the events that had just transpired.

"Maybe I went a little overboard. It's just that he was saying such horrible things, and I was just about to tell you that I loved you and he started saying just the complete opposite-!"

"Angel-" Crowley choked out.

"-And then he tried to kill you, Crowley! How was I supposed to keep still while someone was pointing at you with a bloody spray filled with holy water-"

"_Angel_."

"-truly a wretched creature, I'm pretty sure he didn't even tell anyone he was coming here. And where in Heaven did he get that holy water from!?"

"Aziraphale!" Crowley interrupted, "pump the brakes for a second and rewind. Did you just say you were going to confess to me?"

"I, erm, well, yes. You see, just before he appeared, I was going to tell you-" he didn't get a chance to explain any further because Crowley's lips we're firmly pressing against his, and suddenly words were not so important.

"Did I, ah, scare you? I wasn't too barbaric, was I?

"Angel, I have never seen anything sexier in my entire existence." Crowley said, eyes sparkling with mirth. And a bit of arousal.

"Well, I'm glad. So sorry about the cracks on the wall, though. I'll just miracle them-"

"Leave the wall, you and I have more important matters at hand." Aziraphale let himself be led out of the room by Crowley, the promise of a life away from their respective head offices and close to each other hanging in the air.

He supposed going a bit wild every now and then had his perks, after all.


End file.
